And They Knew Each Other

The authors of this hugely important book are co-founders of the Tamera Community in the Portugal, and have been partners for over 40 years. Spending time in this community is to enter a palpable field of love and trust at its entrance – this field has been built up over many years and is seen by community members as an ongoing research project. It also has a fundamental ecological and peace mission, most recently embodied in the series of conferences Defend the Sacred, organised with indigenous leaders. Despite the liberation of the 1960s, our culture still embodies extensive structures and patterns of repression around sexuality and its relationship to the shadow, violence and war – psychologically in terms of shame and guilt - and manifest in its most extreme form in widespread rape associated with military campaigns. The book is written in two parts, the first by Dieter and the second a complementary feminine view by Sabine. Their own relationship has provided the crucible for their lifelong research project around a joint commitment to love, freedom and transformative social action. The secrecy and guilt arising from sexual affairs stems from our inherited social structures and expectations with accompanying feelings of betrayal, jealousy and anger. The authors and the community show that another way is possible, and that free love - paradoxically at first sight - opens up a space for the development of real trust and openness. They argue on the basis of experience that free sexuality and partnership are in fact quite compatible, freedom and faithfulness belong together.

Another key point is that our emotional patterns are reflections of collective processes and that we are all striving for the same sense of love, trust and belonging that a mature community can potentially support. We need to affirm our sexual nature, while reconciling the forces of the Eros and Agape within us. Sabine places special emphasis on this, reminding readers of the link between women, sexuality, the body and nature. The fight against the body has entailed the repression of the feminine and sexuality, the splitting off of mind from body despite our longing for union. She illustrates these themes with key personal experiences, highlighting the intrinsic connection between sexuality and the sacred, which is almost absent from our culture – imagine the revolutionary effects if this became part of the syllabus for sex education. To engage with this powerful book is to enter into the Sacred Matrix of Life and Love itself, essential nourishment at every level of our being. The genuine renewal of our culture and a future of peace depends upon fulfilling our deepest needs in intimate relationships and transcending the destructive patterns inherited from the violence of our history. Essential and transformative reading for global healing.